>Halloween 2019 >invite friends over >several friends, are coming >i'm a nice guy so i allow it realize all of them are shitlibs >we're talking Starbucks Marxist Young Turks fans >three days before halloween buddy calls >we regularly make Nazi jokes and speak broken, angry German at eachother >I jokingly tell him to dress for the party as an SS officer >dude's 6'3", semi-built, blonde, blue eyes >he says he'll think about it >fas forward to Halloween >he's late >call him, >"Hey bro, where you at?" >"Bro. You did it? >I see headlights outside >he drove his wife's Volkswagon. >little red slug-bug pulls up >Shitlibs have no idea >I realize what might happen >buddy steps out of his car >lights a fucking cig attached to one of those weird sticks >i open the door so nobody hears him >steps in my living room in front of 15 people >"VER IZ ZE JUDEN?" >he sees our buddy Zach >Zach is cool. He gets up and runs >SSbro catches him >wrestles him out the front door >drags him to his slug bug >girl with blue hair is on her phone >all my friends who get the joke are having THE BEST time >i'm praying she didn't call the police She called the police. >SSbro peels out >was actually taking Zach on a beer run >too embarassed to actually go into a store by himself >they get pulled over on the highway >apparently SSbro rolled down the window >told the officer "Oh thank god, will you get this guy to the chamber for me? >cop did not laugh